Friday, December 19, 2008

Free cable and lessons...in your dreams

You’re the third person to be hearing this from me; my dreams are so real! It’s like whatever I wanted to do or never had the chance to do in real life, I get to do it in my dreams. Cool, huh? It brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “in your dreams, sucker”. Yes, I’ll do it in my dreams, thank you.

This only happened recently. I was supposed to pass a message to someone but never quite had the chance to, but I got the message through in my dream. And then there was another time I thought, hmm it’s been some time since I asked my friend out and guess what? I asked her out in my dream that very night. There are a bunch others but you don’t want to hear them.

Lately they even come in complete storylines. It’s like a script carefully written for the screens. Really, my dreams have never been so real and interesting before. It’s got the protagonist (usually me, ha ha ha), the climax, the ending, etc. How cool is that?? This is one of the reasons I love to sleep. Who doesn’t? Heh heh.

Man, if they’re real, it’d be dating the likes of Fukuyama Masaharu and Kim Jae Won and living in a mansion (Now, that’s what I call dreaming while you’re awake. These don’t happen in my dreams. They’re pretty down to earth, too bad). Earth calling mars. Come back Runawaycat.

Now, the problem is this. Because I have realistic…Wait, so it’s realistic now? I thought it was supposed to be an interesting TV drama? Fine, so they’re both interesting and realistic. Wow, this could make me big bucks in Hollywood. Ok back to the problem. You see, I can’t tread water like really tread water. What?? I move around when I try to tread water. That’s not really treading water anymore is it? That’s swimming -_-“ It’s probably coz I make significant arm strokes…whatever you call it, at the same time. But that’s swimming! I know that you idiot. If I don’t move my hands I’ll sink like titanic.

So now, the problem is… What? Another problem? I think I can tread water already. Or so I think…It’s pretty clear in my mind that I’ve already learnt it but the thing is, as far as I can’t remember, the last time I entered the pool was like 2 years ago (That’s how much I hate the water. Makes me wonder why I throw a shitload of money to learn scuba diving. Sigh. Youth). I would never remember it so clearly if it happened 2 years ago. So you see, the yin of having realistic dreams is that it’ll mess up your mind. I’m not sure if I learnt it in my dreams (which isn’t really learning) or I can tread water without looking like an idiot now. Which is it??

Only way to find out – jump into the pool! But that’s not likely gonna happen.

500 words just to make a point.
.
.
.
Wait, how do I tread water again? Okay, I’m waking up. It really must have been a dream.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Almost birthday post

You know there was supposed to be a birthday post. I was looking forward to write one a couple of months ago, about how perfect 2008 was and how enlightening life being 22 years old was.

I was going to tell you about the things I did this year; improved my photoshop skills (though still crappy), subbed the Japanese TV show Tensai! Shimura Doubutsuen (that was tough job so I’ll never do it again anytime soon), finished reading all my japanese study books…wait I’m sure there are more…traveled the most? Yea, yea, probably. What else? Man, I should have made a list.

And I was also supposed to tell you how I bought a cake and ate it whole with a spoon, sitting on my car hood, watching the plane fly by above me. So Taiwanese drama. Ack.

And then the day came. And then there was total silence. I got lazy and spent most of my time on the bed. Right. That was how it all went. Who cares? It’s just another day.

And right now, I want to eat a cake. And I want udon. My two friends actually celebrated for me 2 weeks earlier in a Japanese restaurant. Yummy. I want fattening food. I don’t care, I’m getting donuts this Sunday.

This is starting to sound like a blog which I would never write – a diary.

I got a mail yesterday. As in, in my letter box. The one made of steel, where you can open it with a key. No, not the one where you open with your index finger and a mouse.

It was by dmail2u, whatever that is. I’ve never heard of it. Funny thing is they know my surname, and that I’m a girl (deduced from the fact that they addressed me as Ms.), my birthday and my address. If they were randomly sending out mails they wouldn’t get all these details right, would they? I googled it and still couldn’t comprehend what this is all about. I checked their website which was of no help. Check it out yourself.

Anyway, in this mail was a booklet of adverts with offers valid during your birthday month. I didn’t go through it thoroughly because the offers were like expensive spas, hotel stays, steamboat, etc which pretty much doesn’t suit a cheapskate like me. You know what they should send this kinda stuff to the friends and family of the person with the birthday. Don’t you just agree?

Well, that’s all from my almost came true birthday post. Let 23 be an even better time!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Bugland

What’s the first thing I hear when I step out of the room in the morning?

“Crunch, crunch, crunch.”

You wouldn’t have guessed. It’s the sound of dead beetles being squashed by my Japanese slippers. It doesn’t get any better when you actually walk out of the hostel into the corridors on the ground floor. There, you see them plastered all over the walls and piles of them on the floor. They actually remind me of the black pickled beans (is that what you call it?) you eat with porridge. And the smell. Oh the smell!

Well, the beetles are more of an annoyance than a danger. Then, what’s danger?

People, let me introduce you to Charlie.


Oh that’s one on my bed. Yay!

See the present they left me on Charlie Eve.


One on my arm.


And one on my thigh.


Oops. It’s dead. That’s my gift back to you. Have fun in hell.

A few days ago there were so many Charlies I could fill a cookie jar if I collected all of them. Every night about 20 of them will die in my hands (Bwahahahaha!). Killing every Charlie I see is not a hobby you know. I’d pray that they stay away from my room every day. But I have to admit. I did think of making a collage of Charlies. Perhaps an attempt born out of desperation? It started as a collage of bugs when I first came to this place. But I got lazy. And when Charlie infested my room, I thought, why not? They’d actually make a nice piece on the wall. Might even sell for a hundred bucks. No?

After that it started raining every night and they disappeared. There’s always one or two, but never 20. That’s when the beetles came. They stink so don’t even bother about beetle collage.

And now, it’s back to sunny days. Charlies are coming out to play. There are Charlie juniors and even mutated Charlies. The mutated ones have big butts and look like they cross bred with big ants.

Oh hullolejah. I’m now a certified entomologist. Had fun with my lecture?

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Updateness

Finally, here’s some updatenes. I figured I shouldn’t abandon this place just like that.

I was walking in the rain again. We waited for like 3 hours earlier but the rain just wouldn’t stop. For some reason the sky loves to take a leak whenever we go out for our dinners. This is already the second time. But this was better though. The first time, the rain was heavier and we were totally soaked and it was 2 am.

I also had the experience of pushing a car. We rented a car and when we got back I switched to the driver’s seat because I wanted to try a manual car. I drive an auto car. The last time I drove a manual car was like 5 years ago. It was exciting and I was circling the school over and over again until when I was doing a three point turn, the engine died. We ran out of gas. Thank god we were in campus grounds. I got out and together with another friend, pushed the car all the way to the hostel. It was midnight.

I have to admit, it was fun. I mean I’ve wanted to walk/run in the rain since I haven’t done it for a longggg time. And to run out of gas and push the car, not everyone gets to do that. Call me weird. It was sweet memory.

So now I have 11 more days here before my exam finishes and I go back to Penang. I don’t really have much to complain really, except for the slow connection, but that too, I’ve got used to. Another thing is bothering me though. There’s this bug we call ‘Charlie’, or the ‘Nike bug’ that’s quite harmful. You don’t get sick or anything but you get a big papule with pus coming out of it if it bites you. The version of Charlie in Penang can cause this just by walking on your skin. No papule, just pus and ugly. But there aren’t many in Penang. You only see them once in a blue moon. They’re everywhere here, especially in my room, on my table, lately. My friend was bitten on her arms and her nose. I’m just waiting for my turn. Can I be left alone? Please?

You know how I was really sad about what I study and how I’ll be bonded to the government for 4 years? It’s amazing how things take its course. Now I have alternatives and life is exciting again. I was thinking, it doesn’t really matter what you do, there will always be new opportunities. So it’s best to follow your heart, even though you are advised against it for ‘practical’ reasons. Even if your dream doesn’t have good prospects, you need not worry. There will always be opportunities, good ones, and you just have to look for it. It’s like treasure hunting. Sometimes I do regret spending 4 years studying this, but hey, it’s not that bad. I’ll just have an extra road to walk on.

There, I’ve cramped everything in one post. I have more to say, but that will be after I turn dreams into reality. Wish me luck and courage.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

They love Bush

so much that they would come up with this



Honestly, whoever did this has got some creativity up his sleeves. Do they get paid? Coz if they do, they'd be rich.

Monday, September 22, 2008

The Glass Castle

As far as I can remember, I never liked reading memoirs. How can it be any more interesting than a textbook? The only memoir I’ve ever read before The Glass Castle was about our former finance minister (are your eyes falling out of its sockets from reading this?) That’s if it can even be regarded as a memoir. If I didn’t remember wrongly, it was more like his life told from the perspective of a third person. For all I know, I only read it after submitting to the requests of my history teacher.

But I was glad I read The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls. The author wrote about her past without an ounce of self-pity. What initially attracted me to this book was that her parents were homeless.

Her dad (other than the drinking and gambling) reminded me of mine, who would sometimes teach me random things kids my age never knew. The journey of reading that book was filled with laughter and tears. Best of all, she could describe it all using simple English unlike some writers who gives you a headache by using bombastic words and sentences of a hundred words long.

I think it’s too soon to make any conclusions, but what the heck, I think memoirs are cool coz they’re about progress and not about the ending like most fictional novels and you don’t really look forward to the final chapter or to finish reading it. What’s more, these are actual happenings, and thus making it even more interesting.

Reading the last page, and then looking back at its title, The Glass Castle, sent a pang of sadness through my soul.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Tutup sepenuhnya

Wanna know what that means? It means ‘Fully closed’. This was the words I got when I reached the doorstep of the library a while ago. I had purposely set the alarm at 10 am (though I only woke up at 10:30) so I could make it in time to borrow another novel before they close for prayers at noon.

But surprise, surprise! From 18th to 30th September, the library will be opened from 8:30 am to 4:30 pm from Sunday to Thursday and will be FULLY closed on Fridays and Saturdays. And it’ll be fully closed again during the Raya celebration and two days after that. If you’re wondering why it’s open on Sundays and not Fridays, that’s because the week starts on a Sunday here and Friday is their big day. I’m trying my best not to be sarcastic.

So now, HALF closed makes complete sense to me. If they can say things like FULLY closed, half closed should be a regular word for them.

Now I have to make sure I carefully hang on the what quarter of The Glass Castle I have left for the weekend. I don’t know if it’s just my luck with the library. I think I’ll just take it as a morning stroll.

I promised I would tell about the toilet here. From what Malaysians know, Kelantan is a place where different sexes must line up in separate lines, and there are no cinemas, or karaoke, or whatever. Well, they’re partly true. I still haven’t come across any ruling which segregates different sexes. But what I did come across was a unisex toilet!

There’s one in our hostel café. It’s a lone unit with a label ‘Tandas’ on it which means ‘toilet’. When we saw men and women going in and out, we were intrigued. I knew I had to at least go in that Ally McBeal toilet once.

When me and my friend were done, one guy walked in and was shocked to see 2 girls there. He made a 180 degrees turn, paused and made another 180 degrees turn back and into one of the cubicles. When he got out of the toilet he started to investigate its door for labels other than ‘Tandas’. Man, that was funny.

There’s also one unisex toilet on all the floors of the sad two-storey library. However, I suspect it to be staff toilets because they’re squeaky clean. Or maybe it’s because the library is a ghost town. The staff toilets in the departments in the hospital are a disappointment. This shows what kind of staff they hire.

And last night I discovered that this place transforms into a scary world at night. Me and two of my girl friends walked out of the campus for supper and on the way back around midnight, there were motorcycles passing by that would call us out, and one even slowed down beside us. That was freaking scary. After that fella, another car drove up next to us. My friend saw him roll down the window and smiled a mischievous smile. Other cars honked when they passed us. I’ll never go out for supper here with just girls ever again.

There’s nothing positive here to brag about except the intriguing toilet.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Wiieee!~

I don’t know why the Wi-Fi Alliance would coin the phrase ‘Wireless Fidelity’ irresponsibly because it doesn’t make any sense to me. Maybe you can say it is a wireless connection that remains faithful to you whenever, wherever you go, never letting you down. If that’s the case then I can very well say this medicine campus here has Wii.

Stop! Don’t get too excited! They surely don’t have the Nintendo Wii.



Wii here stands for ‘Wireless Infidelity’ just like how it sometimes is loyal and totally delivers everything (with the approval of the oh-so-loved Fortinet), but most of the time cheats on you and shows you nothing but a blank web browser.

But even after my ‘long’ rant (really, a rant can never be too long or too short… wait…? Forget it), the main purpose of this post has nothing to do with wireless’ infidelity. It’s again, about the good old library.

I was just shoo-ed out of the 2nd floor of the library because it apparently closes at night. *enter lots of exclamation marks here*

Not only is this campus’ library small and has nothing but medical and some fictional books (which is located on the god-damned 2nd floor), half of it closes at night? I’m sorry, did you hear that right, coz I didn’t. I simply grabbed a novel because I didn’t want to leave there empty handed and lucky me, so far, the story is good.

Monday, September 8, 2008

A case of OLCD?

Geographically, I could get into trouble for putting the following photos on the web. We were assigned to go to a clinic this week. What makes this place worth mentioning is that everything in the office is labeled. Everything!

Take the standing fan and the chair for example.


Sorry for the bad quality. It only reflects the standard of my cheap phone. Geez, the MP3 installed in it just kamikaze-d itself the other day.

Here’s another one which almost made me explode into laughter – a labeled wall clock.

And finally, I don’t think anything can beat this. This is like the jaw-dropper of all things you can ever label.

Even the fluorescent light tube is labeled -_-“

A case of OCLD – obsessive-compulsive-labeling disorder?

P.S.: This post fits perfectly for its 'label'.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

And plop it goes down

Runawaycat has to run away again! Actually this is last week's story but anyway...here's yours truly in her room getting ready to escape.


Hmm...my 80L bag doesn't look that big does it? Maybe I should get a bigger one next time.

And here's my new 'haven'. But I don't have much to complain other than the lousy internet connection.


None of these pictures have anything to do with the title of this post. I was just trying to kill two posts with one :) Understand? Oh by the way, the reflection in the mirror, it's not me. Stop guessing.

If I were to really show you a picture of what the title is all about, I think you wouldn't be able to take it. It'd be so hardcore, you would cry and beg for mercy.

So tell me, what goes plop? Why, that would be shit of course. The toilet in the hostel can't be flushed so each time after you do your business you'll have to wash it down with the hose connected to the tap.

Just so you know, my poop here is almost beautiful. (Let's not go to how beautiful it is, ok? Though I wouldn't mind.) And when you wash it down, it goes all down with a big heavy plop. Exciting, no? Plop. Plop. Fun. You can even estimate the distance it travelled before hitting the other end. I say it's about three quarters of a foot. And the loudness justifies its weight. I didn't think it'd be that heavy.

Now I feel so much better. I couldn't share this with my room mates. They'd probably think I'm a fruitcake. I'm disgusting aren't I? But the plop, nothing else will sound like it.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Marked Down

After going through a fair amount of procrastination, I have finally come to post this entry in response to Philos’. He was fussing over (Ok maybe he wasn’t. I just wanna make him sound like he is :P) what a bargain he got with Lays potato chips and about discount conspiracies. It was still a bargain though but I don’t really care coz Lays will always be expensive to me and it’s not all that nice anyway.

So I was telling him that I’ve seen prices being marked down before being discounted. I’m starting to sound like a grandma telling stories aren’t I? Anyway, point is, I came across the same situation again.

Here’s the price tag of a shirt I bought for 70% off:



You can see that the price has been marked down before. If you don’t trust the price ticket at the bottom, I have another pic that shows the price ticket hidden underneath the new one:

So yay! Prices aren’t always marked up. In fact, they do get marked down, sometimes. Uh…the end.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

OMFG!!!

OMFG!!! They just grabbed my last piece of entertainment right out of my hands!!! Just like that!!! I was 'happily' (relatively) streaming (extremely slowly) from Crunchyroll last night and today it has been blocked!!!!!!!! OMFGGGGG!!!! What the f*ck is wrong with these people trying to suck every possible life out of you?!?!?!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

How you define a lifeless soul

If you live in a shabby room, it’s still a life. If there’s practically no entertainment and the most hip shopping mall is worse than the worst mall back home, you’ll still survive. But if the internet connection sucks and you cannot visit your favourite webpages because it’s being freaking blocked, then I tell you, you have no life.

Yours truly have no life. All the energy in me has been sucked out when I found out how the connection here sucked. I have no complains about the shabby room, or the relatively undeveloped environment. But you don’t take away one’s internet. No. That’s the next worst thing you could ever do to someone next to taking away their freedom. Heck I’ll even give up on sleeping late and waking at 6 am everyday for a better connection.

Oh just in case you’re wondering what happened to me, I’ve come to Kelantan as part of my uni course.

Let’s list down the things that are slowly eating away my life.
1. The connection sucks big time.

2. Firefox doesn’t work with this connection, god knows why. And now that I’ve gotten used to Firefox, and webpages I visit function better with Firefox, they decide to make my life suck even more by taking it away. Sheesh, even Yahoo Mail can’t load properly with IE, what’s there left to say about Gmail?

3. Megaupload and Mediafire is totally blocked. There goes my Tensai Shimura Doubutsuen and Himitsu no Arashi-chan. I can’t log into IRC. There goes the dramas I download from the IRC servers. My one and only source now is Crunchyroll which streams at a speed 10 times slower than at home.

4. This is practically the only detectable WiFi in this area. No WiFi service outside campus. Geez I don’t even know if there’s one 300 km away. It wouldn’t matter. I have no car now so I can’t possibly carry the laptop around this sad town.

5. Did I say this is a sad town?

6. Things here are more expensive. One would expect things in small towns to be cheaper but nooo…The reason is they don’t produce these things and have to ‘import’ them from neighbouring states? (i.e. Penang? Since it’s cheaper there? :/) I don’t remember Penang producing instant noodles and biscuits and bla bla bla. I thought we produce electronics. Oh well, I suppose I don’t know my home so well. Well of course there are certain things which are cheaper. Bah. Whatever. I can’t have keropok everyday.

Let’s share one interesting story with you. On the way here, we passed a place in another state, I don’t know, maybe it was Grik. The bus stopped there (which sold food at amazingly high prices, higher than KL) for lunch. I went to the paid toilet (which is also more expensive than elsewhere) and saw a notice which says you have to remove your shoes and wear the slippers provided before you go in. Huh???? I’m sorry, come again?! I was not only confused. I was VERY confused. Who goes to a public toilet this way?! And it’s not like it’s a 7 star toilet. I rate it 1 star. Take off my shoes? Not even in you dreams man.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Geometry is disgusting

One of the few things that I absolutely cannot look at is identical geometrically shaped little things placed in a certain repetitive design. Remember the email which was circulating around since years ago about this woman who had stuff growing out of her breasts after visiting Africa? Yea? Yea, that geometrically shaped holes arranged in a repetitive pattern. Remember? It doesn’t matter if it really happened. I couldn’t sleep or eat without having flashes of those disgusting holes for a whole week.

And now the nightmare is repeating itself. I came across something which matched those criteria – identical geometrically shaped little things arranged in a certain order on the rearlamp of my car. They were yellowish, shiny, and oval-like shaped, about 5 times smaller than a sesame seed, aligned in rows of 4 or 5, I don’t know, I can’t afford to picture it any longer otherwise I would puke all over my laptop. Too bad I didn’t have a camera or my phone with me at that time. But that could be a good thing. I don’t need pictures of it plastered over my blog to remind me of it. No thank you.

They looked like eggs and I bet they were. God knows what’s developing inside. Shit. Now I feel itchy all over. I hate living things with 6 or more legs. It creeps me out. I hate looking at scales too. They’re repetitive. I’m fine with scales on fishes but not if they are scales growing out of a furry animal. Fuuoooaah stop imagining!

I have to crush it. Crush those eggs. Make it messy. Of course not with my fingers. No fucking way. Maybe with a long stick or something. I should imagine myself doing it right now. And break all those geometrical holes in that woman’s breast. Maybe dip a stick into one of those holes and start stirring vigorously until all those holes become one huge hole. Must destroy it. Must.

Shit. There it is again. Flashes of those yellowish stuff. My mind! My mind! AhHhhHHh!!! My mind!!!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Fall Fashion

No matter how many times I watch this, I would still laugh my head off.



Thanks to Paolo for embedding it here. I can't help but include it in my nice little archive. Ahh...satisfied.

Friday, July 18, 2008

You don't ban a country...a country bans you, no?

I just found out Veoh has banned Malaysia from accessing its contents...the hell, I can't even access the main page. Yea, yea, I know this is yesterday's news. But I bet none of you that actually read my blog uses Veoh so you don't care right? Yea, I don't care whether you like reading this or not too.

This is what I got from Yahoo answers. I can't even access the freaking Veoh site so how the hell can I get the original announcement and freaking (like reluctantly) link to it?

"Unfortunately Veoh has ended service in your country due to a low concentration of users. Veoh is maintaining service in countries when we have the highest concentration of viewers.

We are sorry for any inconvenience."

"Veoh is maintaining markets when we have the highest concentration of
viewers."


The hell this is the reason.

Sigh. Veoh downloads are like super fast compared to other P2Ps (at least for me it is) and this is heartbreaking! I was still happily downloading in Singapore last month. Oh wait, am I breaking Singapore's rules? Sheesh! You did not hear this.

And if I really wanna use Veoh there are like some proxy methods or something I should use. Huh? What? Poksi? Too much homework.

So no more fast downloads, only fast streaming from Crunchyroll. But for some reason I'm having problems with it right now. It's like stuck. Oh no not them too. Not crunchyroll. NO! Dame! Zettai dame! It'll get better tomorrow. I'm sure it will. Haha. My streaming life depends on it.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

My stuff have legs

Things I own have legs. They have mutated. Just the other day I couldn’t find my newly photocopied notes. I could swear I flipped over all my notes and I still couldn’t find it. I don’t know why but this happens every semester, I’ll somehow manage to misplace my notes. F*ck (I’m polite today, Alzheimer’s can’t be rude, I don’t remember why)

Luckily I did not photocopy another set because it showed up yesterday, nicely tucked in its folder. Anyway, I’ll give it the benefit of doubt – it doesn’t have legs.

The story doesn’t end there however. That set of notes is still there, I think, but my student card has disappeared. Completely vanished into thin air. I think the last I saw it was on Saturday, the day I bought a new wallet. I could swear it was still around when I switched to the new wallet.

I’ve searched everywhere (ok so maybe not everywhere, just everywhere possible) but I still can’t find it. My head hurts. This is not funny. I can’t f*cking find it!

Things don’t disappear. That defies the law of…law of…indestructibility of matter. Molecules don’t just disappear and David Copperfield is a liar. Now where the hell is my student card?

Friday, July 11, 2008

Cool~

With the Olympics approaching, I guess this is appropriate :)



But people still get into fights, Olympic season or not,


This was actually the first vid I watched and I was pretty confused at first coz the one I watched had really bad quality.

Try to figure out how they did this:





Apparently I'm supposed to link to this site.

Great. Now I can't stop watching.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Gaki no Tsukai

I used to think that Gaki no Tsukai is just a show about the players having to hold their laughter or get smacked right on the butt. But these links that I'm going to show you (and you are going to click), are just harsh. They can laugh all they want, but I don't think they would want to anymore.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

It's hardcore but it gets funnier and funnier too.
Look out for the -Ass-, -Heipo-, etc :P

Saturday, July 5, 2008

What flavour are you?

You know I’ve got used to the dollar so much so that the price of everything in ringgit seems small here. It makes me wanna buy. I can’t imagine how it would be like if I came back from UK or something.

Anyway that’s not what I wanna say here. Today’s topic is about condoms. Condoms are interesting blogthings though they sometimes get you into trouble in this highly conservative we-encourage-the-spread-of-aids country. Well it won’t be about vibrating condoms today. Today it will be about flavours.

Don’t ask me why or how but we joined a product training and one of the products happened to be Durex. Out of the wide range of Durex condoms, one had flavour. So my innocent guy friend decided to ask a highly sophisticated question in a highly intelligent manner.

“What are the flavours for? Why did they have to incorporate flavours into condoms?” (Imagine Einstein asking Hawking about the big bang)

My girl friend pretended not to hear his question. Now if you don’t know what the flavours are for, you won’t find this funny and (shame on you!).

She repeated his question to us and we felt like bursting into laughter. A guy asking that question! Doesn’t the other guy sitting next to him know the answer?

Apparently not. Thirsty (or rather, hungry) to know why, that friend of mine (oh where should I hide my face?) raised his hands during the Q&A session.

“What are the flavours in the condoms for?”

*FAINT!!!*

Of course he got his answer in a highly professional manner. No bursts of laughter. Boring.

What I find unbelievable is when we told others about this nobody laughed. Instead we got questions like, “So what are the flavours for?” and “I thought it was so it wouldn’t smell?” -_-“ Citizens of a conservative country indeed. Now, when I meet my high school friends and if they don’t laugh, I’m gonna bang my head against the wall. So please, for my loving head’s sake, laugh.

Friday, July 4, 2008

Where the hell is my welcome home drink!?

I’m back!!! The monster is back! (For some reason I feel like calling myself the monster today. Like what I would always advise my readers, it’s best to ignore me). Anyway, as much as you may think I’m delighted to be back, from my outrageous opening of this entry (add the Godzilla moves), I’m not. After 2 weeks in Singapore I was crying to go home because of boredom but now that I’ve adjusted to the MRTs and the crazy queues, I don’t want to come back! Going home means going back to piles and piles of uninteresting letters, bills, classes, assignments, long to-do lists, yada yada yada. And they’ve already started to haunt me, only hours after I reached the island. To save you from the misery, I shall keep them all to myself. What a nice monster.

Anyhow, I’m just writing to tell you guys I’m still very well alive even though I somehow had forgotten I have a blog. Sorry for not updating this place and the other one. I’ve a list of things to blog about and I hate lists so God help me do this before I leave the island again! Yes, it has been confirmed, I’ll be going to another state next month to finish up my semester. As much as I love to travel, having to adjust to new environments every month is starting to make me feel sick.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I’d accomplish some of the blogthings in my list tomorrow. I’m sure I will. Pretty sure…

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Lactose Intolerance?

What would you get if you are lactose intolerant but drink milk?

- A lactating anus?

That’s probably it huh? If you can’t digest the milk surely in comes out intact right? Well, something like that. Main thing is you expect liquid. (I hate being quoted by people for giving false info. Especially when it comes to poo issue. You can’t possibly be too serious. Sheesh. This is a blog, hello. Not an encyclopedia. Get a grip.)

I personally never had any lactose intolerant problems but now I’m wondering, can I ever develop one? Some of you may already know from my previous poo entries (here and here if you're interested, but I must warn you, it's not for the faint-hearted), I can’t ‘go’ unless it’s in my home sweet toilet. Seems like I’ve gotten over it already (so yay for me) coz in the past 2 months, I’ve basically poo-ed in a boat in Vietnam, and also in the air 30000 ft above sea level, and of course multiple times in Singapore. But could my bowels have thought of the evil idea of getting over lactase enzymes as well?

Why, oh why am I getting this sort of idea?? That’s coz for the past 2 weeks, whenever I drink milk I get a nature call minutes later. And today, I’ve gone to the loo 3 times in the past 3 hours. Oh please no. Imagine the food I’ll have to miss out if I become lactose intolerant. Cakes, cheese, chocolate…owwww…who looks at the package to see how much lactose they contain?? You just eat dammit.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Interested in our tourims?


It's everywhere; their inability to either spell, or type, or detect mistakes.



I ought to start a new category for Yahoo's mistakes.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Slog

Ok what’s a slog? Joyfulchicken was the one to come up with this word. Slog is a snack blog but the word gives me the impression of laziness. So you see, I’m going to do a slog today and then feel lazy about doing it and not do it again for a very, very, long time.

Now, you would most probably think that this entry will be all about food but let me tell you something. You’ll see food alright, but it’s food I can’t touch.


This is all I have to last me one month courtesy of my cousin. Thank you, thank you, thank you! Because my wallet definitely can’t buy me all these snacks. Honestly I’ve never been in such a sad condition in my life. Of course I’ve been broke before but I’ll just need to stay home till my wallet is replenished regardless how long it may be. But right now I don’t think I have enough money to last me till the end of the month here.

So right now what I do everyday is scout for the cheapest food I can find. I’ve plunged to that low a level in life. Hahahah. I look at all the other delicious food (they look delicious but remember you can’t always judge a book by its cover, same goes for food) but I can never eat them. I’ve betrayed the food club I belong to. I’ve sinned. Forgive me!

Now I have to make sure my snacks last till the end of the month. I get hungry easily and snacks are an essential part of my life. If I’m at home now, these snacks would have been finished in two weeks. Thanks to my mom too for telling my cuz that I love snacks *teary eyed*

We were so poor when we wanted to buy bathroom slippers we walked around Toa Payoh until we found the cheapest that we could possibly find.


Tweety slippers for S$ 2. Back home, I would never buy Tweety. Ok maybe.

So this is how poor students are like. I wanna go home! Tsk. Anyway, this is one experience money (definitely) cannot buy. I'm gonna tell my niece years later like how my uncle told me his flipping burgers story in UK. Yay. But it's less glamorous though. Tsk.

Just so that this is still a slog, let me share with you another snack that I found good.


Oheya by Oishi. I think I’m starting to be a fan of Oishi.


And here you have barley drink in a can. Never seen barley in a can before in my entire life. Exaggerating huh? It’s true.

There you have it, my slog.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Friday, May 30, 2008

Ants with brains

I believe I’ve found the world’s smartest ants. Don’t know if you’ve seen them before but they’re more fragile than other ants. Press on them and you can reduce them to fossil (well, given time :P).

I left a cheesebread on the table last night and when I touched it this morning, a line of ants started escaping from it. I immediately went to the kitchen and passed it to the maid before the ants could crawl all over me. Just as I was about ready to crush whichever remaining ant on the table, they were all gone. Smart huh? Stupid…erm…normal ants usually linger around or run aimlessly but this subspecies went into hiding and they did it quickly too. It’s like they steal your food while you’re sleeping but once they know you’re awake, they run and hide. Becareful, they could take over the world after we humans nuke ourselves. Oh wait. They're fragile. The cockroaches still rule then.

P.S.: Hah! I think it's one of those ants that eats bananas. Or maybe they were just hiding. Hmm...

Oishi Sponge Crunch



Nice nice super nice! I can't stop eating! Oishi Sponge Crunch. Mecha mecha oishii desu! They should reward me with more of this for advertising for them :P

Afther I learn how to spell...

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Runawaycat in Singapore

Today’s long journey has come to an end! For now I’m just gonna stick at home until tomorrow afternoon.

In the Penang flight to KL, I saw a group of guys who looked like Vietnamese and it turned out they are! Lapchai! I was wearing a cap with the words Vietnam on it and when he saw it he was like, “Vietnam! Are you Vietnamese?” in super fluent English. Too bad I was already seated in the plane and he had to move to the back, like really, really back. So I ended up talking to the Dubai guy next to me.

And during the flight to Singapore from KL, one Chinese sat a seat away from me. I couldn’t discern whether he was a she or a he so I refrained from talking to him/her. It’s dangerous when the situation is this way. You might get in trouble (Just use your imagination). If only a cute guy was sitting next to me. I could have started a conversation and maybe get myself a tour guide, if he’s from Singapore :P

My first flight was with Air Asia and for the first time I thought I’ve finally found an Air Asia flight with nice stewardesses. How wrong was I. When we reached LCCT, the plane stopped for a while and 2 guys stood up to get their bags. The stewardess asked them to sit. Then later the plane moved and stopped again. This time a couple stood up and walked along the aisle. This totally pissed off the stewardess.

“Please sit down” she said in a teacher-threatening voice.
Then she continued, “Can’t you understand simple English?”

Ho ho ho! Monster stewardess.

From this point onwards I’m gonna share my agony with you. My backpack was almost 10 kg, thanks to the compulsory formal wear (which meant extra pairs of shoes too) that I have to bring. And my laptop bag was, what, 4 kg? I don’t know, it’s just goddamned heavy. It was agonizingly painful to carry. And my boarding gate had to be at the very end. Thank you for inventing the travellator, whoever you are! Though I wish you could have made it faster, like the escalator in the MRT stations. Gawd, it totally reflects the hectic Singaporean lifestyle. And when I reached Singapore it had to be the peak hours and I didn’t even get to sit all through the confusing MRT journey. I can’t help but see the sign “Please offer this seat to someone who needs it more than you” everytime and feel betrayed. Does carrying a 10 kg bag with an almost bent to the max spine, looking like a half-dead fish not count as someone who needs the seat more than all you bastards glued to the seat? When I finally reached my destination, I couldn’t feel my shoulders anymore. I need Yoko Yoko.

And I’m gonna end this now because it’s taxing my shoulders to be typing so much.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Colonel Sanders would be proud

I went out to buy supper just now. I don’t know if it’s the hunger that was making me nauseous or the boredom. I guess it’s both. Anyway I thought McD could do the trick so off I went. Unfortunately it’s Friday night and all the other nauseous people thought they’d flock to McD as well. I couldn’t find a parking space and I can’t risk vomiting in the car so I turned to the less crowded KFC. Expensive and small.

I told the girl I wanted Colonel Burger Combo and she was like, “Colonel burger?”

“Yea, Colonel Burger Combo.”

“Colonel burger? You mean this one? *points to colonel burger image*”

Man I seriously wanted to slap her. Better still, vomit on her. What other Colonel burgers are there? Colonel Ass? Or General Burger? Lieutenant Burger? Sheesh.

Lousy and slow service. Sheesh. I don’t even want to start a racist slur.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Which butt stands taller than Lopez's?

You wanna see my new car? You know what? I’ll even throw in my old car.

See, the thing is, it’s taking longer than I expected for me to get used to the new car. First of all it’s longer than the old car. I thought they were the same coz the look the same, but no. This new car sorta eats up all the parking space. And it’s got a rear as high as Jennifer Lopez’s (lying down on her stomach, can't be too explicit) I think I’m gonna have to get it insured like how she did. I can’t freaking see anything behind me (On the rear mirror. Again, you can’t be too explicit with words). I can only see the sky (Ok that was a little exaggerated).

(None are my actual cars)


Old car

???

I can’t get the specs. The car is so old nobody cared to measure its length back then.


New car

Length: 4.477 m

That’s long isn’t it? According to this site, it's longer than every car it listed there except Toyota Avensis. Is that something like Avanza? Whatever.

Anyway it’s not the length that’s the matter. It’s the butt. I can’t see the big shopping trolley (that some idiot left behind) at my back while I was trying to park the car. Luckily I didn’t take that lot. Yea sure there’s the sensor but I usually park the car following my guts. I hated the sensor. Guess I’ll have to start liking it now.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I'm a stray cat!

I think I know qualify to be a stray cat. The dates of my training in Singapore has been postponed for 1 week and unfortunately for me I've already booked my flights (Huh flightS? If you're wondering, I have not lost my mind...yet. I have connecting flights okay) Now I have 1 week free in Singapore with nothing to do but most importantly NOWHERE TO STAY. Either I pay a tonne to change my flights or I pay a tonne for accommodation in Singapore...Hmm... which is it?

I've searched hostel/guesthouse sites and the cheapest I can find is SGD 12 per person per night. Now the thing is this hostel lists SGD 12 in one site and SGD 18 in another site. Wth? Make up your mind please. But it wouldn't matter because those prices are for private rooms (? It says dorm but the price says whole room. Shouln't you just pay for the bed in dorms?) and I most probably will have to foot the bill of the rest of the invisible beings that will be occupying the 'empty' beds in the room. That would make it unthinkably expensive. Tsk help.

Anyone know of a cheap hostel that caters for a single person? Anyone free enough to keep a cat? Anyone with an empty house looking for someone to look after it for a month? I'll do it free of charge *blink blink*

I have NO PLACE TO STAY!!!!

EDIT: Not a stray cat anymore :P

Wallpaper done!


My 'abandoned' project is finally done. Looks crowded don't you think? Really crowded...You probably know none of them. No Jpop/rock fan reads my blog.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Camp of a lifetime

I’m back home again after 4 and a half days in Kedah, which is a neighbouring state to Penang. I was there for a school project and we were assigned to stay with families in the area where our project took place, i.e. homestay. The whole program was like attending an army camp yet an anorexic treatment camp at the same time.

It felt like an army camp because our project leader has anger management problem; imagine those generals you see on TV, or your school’s discipline teacher. It was an anorexic camp because our ‘foster parents’ kept feeding us food; not that it’s a bad thing, considering my financial status, but that gained me 1 kg. Some participants had to go out and buy themselves food, whereas I came back home with my packets of security instant mee untouched.

Honestly, for the past 4 days, I sorta hated food. Or should I say I sorta hated lunch, tea, and dinner times. Breakfast was ok because I’d be hungry after a long night’s sleep (long in terms our stomach hours). On the first day I had 2 lunches in 1 hour. Imagine that. When we arrived we ate the lunch that was provided and when we arrived at our foster parent’s home, we had a second lunch. We told them we already had lunch but apparently we were ignored. It’d be rude to not eat so we had to swallow everything down no matter what. Before we even had time to digest our lunches, it was time for tea. Oh the horror. Don’t you call this a camp for anorexics? But, but, but…I still have to say this, thank you for not making me buy my own meals!

The family was nice to us and the auntie even gave us a big ang pau this morning… it’s all about the money hahahah. (I just came back today and I’m tired yet here I am. See how dedicated I am to the what little concerned readers I have :P I deserve a treat, don’t you think?)

As for the army camp, I would have written a 10 page blog 2 days ago if I had access to the computer but I think I’m just gonna forget it now. Too much anger isn’t gonna do me any good, though if you’re interested I’d be glad to tell you, if I still remember, that is. Now I’m just happy it’s over.

So I have another one week before I start packing my bags again. Sigh. I’ve been leading a one-week-stay-home-interval lifestyle for a month now. One week after my finals I went to Vietnam, one week after I came back from there I went to Kedah. Now one week after this I’ll be going to Singapore. And one week after that the new semester would start. I guess this is the busy traveling lifestyle I dreamt of? Not so fun considering I have things to do at home and my fragile paper pocket that’s going to tear anytime soon. I think I’m gonna have to skip the end year holiday. Tsk.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

What? Packing bags again?

Did you realize that most of the entries on this page are about my packing bags, leaving the house, going another place, yada yada yada? Well, I’m going to be doing it again, this time for ‘work’ which I’d much rather not have to go. I won’t be updating again for until the end of this week so the rest of the Vietnam entries will have to wait till next week.

Just a little something to divert from this monotonous bag packing entries: I bade goodbye to my car today. Tsk. My new car (well, my dad’s new car) arrived today and I enchanged my old car keys with my new one. Tsk. Bye my old car, my first car. You’ll be missed.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Hiatus again perhaps?

My head is in a mess. I don't know why. Maybe it's coz I was in Hanoi for too long, I got used to not having to think about anything besides what to eat and where to go. Now that I'm back, the air feels stagnant. Stale. It's back to procrastination.

I have to think of work to do. Money to earn. Right now I've got no cash flowing in. This gives me a headache. Goddammit I wish I'm still on holiday.

On Hanoi

I've started to write on my trip. Check it out from the yakuza blog. You can find the link on the right column. It's there for a reason you know. Click! Click! Click!

I hope I can finish writing all 9 days before I leave the state next Wednesday. This is going to be a busy 'holidays' for me.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

I'm back!

I can finally feel my computer again haha. Vietnam was fun and I wish I was there longer. Coming back home wasn't really what I looked forward to. Coming back here meant coming back to reality. Now that I think of it, the time spent there was quite surreal. I had totally forgotten all my problems (including that stupid broadband of mine!) and it was like I was totally disconnected from everything at home.

I hope I'll be blogging about it soon. Still lazy right now. I wish I could use jet lag as an excuse but it was only an hour difference between here and Vietnam. Well, see ya soon? *snore*

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Live from Hanoi

...and uh, Hanoi is in Vietnam. A number of people have asked me, so I guess it's best I explain before proceeding.

This will not be much of a blog anyway coz I don't really have that kind of time. The first entry of this trip will be a long one coz some drama took place so it's best to sit down and devote all my time to write a proper entry, right?

So we'll meet again about 2 weeks from now. I hope I still remember whatever happened today after I come back :)

Ciao~

Monday, April 28, 2008

Psy...pys...piss...what?

I was looking through my CF card when I found something I had wanted to show you guys since I studied for the psychology paper.



See the name above the words (well, one half words) highlighted in red? Try reading that.

You fold you die

The income tax form came in the mail with a prepaid envelope folded like this:



And you know what’s funny? On it says, ‘Jangan lipat’, which means do not fold.

I now what they mean. I just felt like making them look stupid. Well, they are, aren't they? At least send it to us unfolded, right?

Sunday, April 27, 2008

All Stars wallpaper

For the past 2 hours, this is what I've been doing:


It's not done yet, but my back's killing me already. So far I have Hyde, Suga Shikao, Hirai Ken and Mr. Children.

I've been wanting to do this for a month now and finally I'm half done! My mom thinks I should pack my bag instead of doing this :P

Mom: Is this your school project?
Me: No. This is for fun.
Mom: What? Go pack your bag!
Me: It's 2 days away!

I'm yabbering. Actually I just wanna show off my 2 hours of photoshop-ing. Hehe. Anyway, how is it? The shadows on the floor aren't so nice I think. But I'm too lazy to start over.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Bed-day

Bed-day. That’s what I lack. I haven’t had a single bed-day for 2 months. And my situation now is implying that I probably won’t have any until 8th of May. When I don’t get adequate bed-days, I get grumpy. I have so mant things to do, typing this blog is a pain. I wish not to do it, but I feel I kinda need to update it for I probably wouldn’t get to for quite some time.

Exam ended yesterday,23rd Arpil, but it felt like it was 2 days ago. I’m tired. I’ve been hanging out with my friends since the last paper until now, 9:51 PM, 24th April. And my butt aches. I feel numb right now – not my butt of course, my butt hurts – but mentally.

I’ve gotta go shop for a shoe tomorrow and to exchange money. USD went up I think. Not like it would matter much, those few cents, but mom is nagging me for not listening to her; to exchange it when it was only 3.11. I’m broke. I need like a thousand. Tsk tsk tsk.

Then on Saturday my aunt’s gonna come over and we’ll most likely go out shopping with her. Sigh. Can I not go?

And Sunday will be luggage day. And at night my long journey starts and it’ll never end until the 7th. My holiday is supposed to be enjoyable. I hope it still is.

Let’s see what I’ve done so far. Went for bowling, 2 movies, a dinner, a supper, a meeting, a lunch, and a wake. A wake. You got that right. my lecturer passes away yesterday. I saw her in the coffin today, and I dare say, I’ve never looked at a corpse at such a close distance before. I didn’t see my grandparents because I was too short that time. This time, looking at her, I don’t know what to feel. She looks empty. Just like a shell. The air felt heavy for a moment. I think I have my ways of viewing death different from you guys but that’s another day’s talk.

I finally remembered why I never played bowling again after my first time. But when I remembered it was already too late. I chipped the nail on my thumb. Not nice.

I watched Escape from Huang Shi. It was good. I finally got over my can’t-cry-in-human-presence syndrome. And I just came back from watching L: Change the World. I have to tell you I was disappointed. L was supposed to awe me with his intelligence but no. L acted as the eccentric stunt man. I know they’re probably trying to show the other side of L, but I want a piece of his intelligence! Sigh. He could speak a few languages fluently though. I like polyglot guys. They’re juicy. But I’d probably like it more if I know more than them hahahah!

Besides discussing non stop in the cinema, my friends cried, watching L. I don’t get it. I hate people who cry over really small things. Or maybe I took it as a small thing because my syndrome is back. When I have that syndrome, my cry threshold is higher.

I’m not even gonna reread what I just wrote. I have to do a banner design and my dad’s income tax tonight. Pray that I get my bed-day ok?

UPDATE: I’m now only posting this entry because I was typing on the sofa just now and I don’t have WiFi. It’s 1:20 AM. Got some problems with the banner. Need a vector logo, not rasterized!!! And I still haven’t started on the confusing income tax form!

UPDATE Update: My flight is Tues morning! Not Monday! This means I leave on Monday night. Everyone has been asking me when I'm leaving and I told them Sunday night. Oh no! I told my friend who went to buy tickets we're flying on Monday! OMG!!! I hope she realizes!

Friday, April 18, 2008

Mahther farking people

I’m living in a fucking fucked up country where killing in broad daylight is totally legal. Two (or three) dogs were shot here today by government officials because somebody made a fucking report. Somebody with the following characteristics: surname – Mah, personality – Conservative, thinking - Narrow. When this three comes together, you get a fucking bastard.

This explains the tree branch covering a big stain on the road when I came back. They were not able to clean away the stain. I think one of the dogs which I happen to like was shot too. She was such a sweet dog. When the van which sells food comes in the morning she would patiently wait a distant from it for the seller to throw her some food. Unlike some uncivilized people, she doesn’t push and elbow. Fuckkkkkk!

I wasn’t around when they came and did their holy act but I was told that four shots were fired and the dogs were killed right on the spot, on the road in front of our unit. This has happened before in my old house too; the dog ran and hid in the drain and they just shot him, right in the drain and fucking in front of my gate. Of course that time it wasn’t a Mah that reported. It was a just a bastard with a fucking attitude.

Everyone knows who reported; we don’t know exactly which individual did it but the first criteria of the three would most probably fit that bastard.

The dogs did nothing wrong; they did not bite, they did not bark. If the chief complain was them dragging rubbish everywhere, then can I complain to the government that some uncivilized people had thrown the rubbish carelessly on the ground and have them shot? If they’re dead, there wouldn’t be accessible rubbish for the dogs to rummage in. The dumpster is so big and spacious (and smells really nice too), so why can’t they throw it in instead of leaving it AROUND it? What’s the fucking point of having a container to contain rubbish if you’re just gonna line it up around its circumference? And can I add a fourth point? – they’re also uncivilized. Let’s do a little Grade 1 logic.

Mahs = uncivilised
Uncivilized = litter everywhere
Therefore, Mahs = litter everywhere
Shoot them!

I don’t know why these type of Mahs hate dogs so much. Note: ‘type’. I’m not generalizing. Fucking assholes in their fucking country. They make this place so warm and fuzzy, uncivilized aliens are coming into the country in droves. It’s so nice and comfy it hurts so much that I need to leave. Fuck you Mahs. Hope you rot in the hell you created for yourselves. I’m a racist. So shoot me.

Friday, April 11, 2008

I guess we are stupid after all

In response to the first entry 'Are we stupid?' and also to prove a fellow commenter's point:

Robber Leaves Resume Behind @ Yahoo! Video
(Lousy Yahoo that doesn't allow embedding. Stupid too)

I shouldn't think too much about the face I saw in that video. He does look like a nice but desperate person. Tsk. A stupid, straight person would surely be better than a sly, cunning one no?

Spill out, damn it!

We all have funny ways of trying to recall things. Some people stare at the ceiling. Some close their eyes. Some grit their teeth. Some jump around like mad. And then there’s also another way which is quite common…

Today in the exam hall, the guy who sat next to me drove me nuts! He was trying to recall the answers to the questions and when he couldn’t (I know because I’m smart :P) he started stomping his feet on the floor. And it’s not just any floor, it’s a floor made of wooden planks where it would send gigantic vibration waves across the room even if you were to just walk on it.

And he did that for 2 hours! As if stomping your feet can make the information spill out of your head. My god, I really wanted to smash his head to pieces. I gave him my vicious stare twice but did he notice? NO! He was to busy trying to put a hole through the floor!

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Are we stupid?

Know who is Lim Goh Tong? No? Ok how bout the founder of Genting, one of the richest guy in Asia? Still no? I guess I have to call in Wikipedia.

Anyway the point of this entry is there are people out there who actually has so much time on their hands, they would create nonsensical emails to be forwarded to everyone.

This is one I got which says that this is the grave of Malaysia's late Tan Sri Lim Goh Tong.

Oh really?? How come none of the people there look like Malaysians? Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't it obvious this is NOT his grave? (But there's always the possibility he made one exactly the same, but I doubt that). If you google 0sss0.com, it is actually a site full of arabic words which I understand none of. Hmm that would really explain why EVERYONE in the picture looks like the middle easterns!

Idiot with too much time on their hands.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Soap Land

After watching Love & Pop yesterday, I scrolled down to the comments section. Someone posted a comment in response to the action of the pervert in the movie who used the hand of a girl he paid to work his tool.

If you're wondering, this movie is about high school girls engaging in enjo kosai or compensated dating. The movie was filmed on hand-held digital cameras, which I thought would make it lousy with the shakings and stuff but it turned out okay. And it's got unusual camera works which makes it unique.

So anyway, in the movie this guy who paid this girl to accompany him to the video store grabbed her hand and shoved it in his pants. One person commented, "That hand-rapist shoulda gone to Soap Land or something..."

Funny!!! So funny I almost choked drinking water. I don't know why I find it so funny, but it's like the high point of reading comments haha. I don't understand 100% what he or she is trying to say but there's just this sarcastic tone to it. Neat. I like sarcasm.

Words of the week: Soap Land

The Wait II

Not only do I have to wait in reality, I even had to wait in my dream. After telling you guys about ‘the wait’ I dreamt that I was at the airport and had to wait 30 days for my flight. The wait was so long (super obvious!) the airport provided a hotel room for me. Now normally if your flight is 30 days away, you stay at home. But it’s completely normal to wait for a month in the airport in my dream. I had a hotel mate but he only had to wait 15 days so I took the calendar and started to plan who I should find for my other lonely 15 days. And uh, that’s about it.

Now back to reality. Remember the place that I called a million times? I don’t know exactly what they do there so let’s call them Call Center 1. If you still remember, Call Center 1 cleverly passed me Call Center 2’s number. So I called Call Center 2 yesterday.

Call Center 2: I’m afraid we won’t be able to help you. You will need to call this Mr. X. He’s in charge of your case. Here’s his number XXX XXXX.

Today I checked the contractor’s number and Mr. X’s. They’re different. So 2 people is in charge? I decided to give the contractor a try first.

Contractor: No, the problem is with the service provider itself. They have not changed to a line capable of providing 2Mbps speed.

So I tried calling Mr. X.

“This is the voice mailbox…”

Hrmp.


Thursday, April 3, 2008

Don't pee in your pants

We can hardly find signs like this in Malaysia. But if you do, don't pee in your pants.








Finally...


...which do you think is the female washroom? I think I'll go with the left.

There are more but I'm too lazy.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

The Wait

Do you think it’s safe to say that half of our lives are dedicated to waiting? We wait in the queue when we’re buying food. We wait for our parents to fetch us from school when we were small. We wait for the elevator when we need to get up or down. We wait for our friends who know how to come fashionably late. We wait for the advertisements to end and our movie to start in the cinema. We wait for the stupid video to load on YouTube (or the other slow streaming sites for that matter). We wait for our boyfriend/girlfriend to return our call. We wait in the car for our mothers to finish their grocery shopping. We wait for the traffic lights to change. You know, I bet I can think of a hundred more and this entry will never end but the main problem I wanna stress today is, yes, the main bitch that sparked off this entry is my broadband connection upgrade.

Almost 3 weeks ago I received a call for an offer to upgrade to 2Mbps. I said ok and was told that within 7 working days their contractor (so they call him) would come with my new modem and IPTV (free trial). So I waited for 1 week and their highly competent contractor hasn’t called yet. I waited for a few more days before I called them again and the girl on the line said she would check. And so after that I waited for another 4 days before I called them again and finally got their undivided attention (right…).

Now, after all those calls I’ve finally managed to get the highly competent and I’d like to add, super busy, contractor here to fix the cables. Guess how surprised I was when I was told that the service hasn’t been upgraded for me yet. And off he goes rushing out of my house as if he saw a gun hidden in my room. I had to stop him so I could ask a “what’s-going-on?” question to which he answered half-heartedly while going down the stairs towards the corridor. How busy can a man be? This is your job, hello? And you’ve already made me wait, like, 3 weeks, hello? Don’t I at least get a decent explanation??

He told me not to call those peeps from the provider company but call him instead. I bet those peeps were putting pressure on him yesterday to come to my place. But I called them anyway. Somebody has to answer me okay?

Operator: Mr. Y (the one I was supposed to seek for problems) is currently engaged with another customer, could you wait for him to call you back? You’re Ms. Runawaycat right?

Great. I called them so many times the whole office probably knows who I am already. So I waited. After like 3 hours, he finally called and cleverly passed me another number which I should call if I have any further problems. And as for the activation I was told to wait another 24 hours. I think I might as well multiply that by 3.

There goes another long wait. When it comes to the billings they would most definitely be efficient but…



With more waits to come I’d like to dedicate this song to all you hopeless people out there and whatever you’re waiting for.

We line on the left and we line on the right,

And we wait, and we wait, and we wait all night,

With a groan and a sigh and a half life gone

Finally!

With a yay and a sigh but a new queue is found!

It sucks I know. Whatever.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Stress your head a little

If you don't mind the slowness of Veoh (or maybe it's only slow to me alone) you can try doing this.



Online Videos by Veoh.com

That fella on the left, his face is so funny I smile everytime I think about it. Even when I'm angry.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Funny commercials

Mind a laugh?





Everybody rock your body...or rocker rock your body?

I just discovered a MV by L'Arc~en~Ciel, a Japanese rock band which has a dance at the end of their song. A rock band dancing. A really cool dance too. And it's very synchronised which makes it cooler (Who in their right minds would put an unsynchronized dance in their MV right?)



Cool, huh? Especially how their back looks like a wave when they uh...bent down, whatever. I don't know what this word may mean to you but I just feel like saying it. Kinky! (no it's not that, don't go there)

This dance sorta reminds me of Backstreet Boys' song 'Everybody' (yea...rock your body yea...) Haha. I bought that album when I was 12. So long ago. 1,2,3...10 years ago! Tsk. I'm rotting old.

Here's the vid. Incidentally the dance is around the beginning so no waiting :P And nail cutter *ahem* Nick Carter's voice is like so 'ah boy' hahahaha!


Sigh. Ii desu ne, dansu wa?

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Mailbox cash

[source]

I swear I dreamt of the same thing 2 days ago. I was with my little brother (I don't have any in actuality - wonder what that means) and we were checking the mailbox. Inside there were a big pile of letters which made me really happy. And below it were notes - Rupiah notes to be exact. And they're brand new too. I have never seen the Rupiah before and Rupiah don't exactly worth much. Damn.

Sleepy cats

Considering that I'm a 'cat' - if you regard c.a.t as that animal who feels they are superior to humans, show little trust in us - and not just merely a word made up of the letters c.a.t, and if it makes you any happier, I've included here, a video on sleepy cats.

http://www.4shared.com/file/16303011/4bd6b46/sleepy_cats.html (it doesn't allow the embedding option, so copy, paste, and hit enter you lazy asshole) I'm sure if I try hard enough I can find the exact same one in YouTube but hello, I need to sleep too okay.

Sigh since my devotion to you made me visit YouTube anyway, here are more silly (but cute) cats.


More than 6 million views? What's with people and cats!? What's with me promoting it here? Weird.
This one has absense seizure. And narcolepsy.

They're kinda adorable when they fall asleep, so much so I wanna twist their heads off. I'm scary. Perhaps I need to fall asleep just like how they do it. Goddamit.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

404 - You are dumb

Stole this from Chickenmafia. I even stole his title. Yay! It's funny, I thought I'd share it here. And then Paolo left this in the comments. I thought it would never end.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Little mozart?



The host of the show is boring though. Or maybe it's the language. Ooops!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

I'll be missing you

Remember this one? It was a huge hit back then. Enjoy~

Saturday, March 22, 2008

A tag?

This is one hell of a confusing tag. So uh...huh? Uh...copy away!

~~Begin Copy~~

This is the easy way and the fastest way to :
1. Make your Authority Technorati explode.
2. Increase your Google Page Rank.
3. Get more traffic to your blog.
4. Makes more new friends.

Rules :
1. Start copy from "Begin Copy" until "End Copy" to your blog.
2. Put your own blog name and link.
3. Tag your friends as much as you can.

1. Chickenmafia
2. Karljam
3. Ah ban
4. Arbet
5. Jeff - HainaneseChicken (I don't think you gave me a reason to your name yet)
6. Katherine with a K
7. Brown Cottage
8. TizzyB
9. Benard Cometh
10. Yakuza (ahem)
11. Geez I have no friends
12. If you happen to be not it the list, don't get angry; it's for your own good. I don't want to have sickos visit your blog.

~~End Copy~~

So now I'm supposed to tag people. Sigh. I'll tag no.2 and no. 3.

It's not easy to be me

I think the song is Kryptonite or maybe Superman; well it’s somewhere along those lines. It was on air the other day and while listening to it I found one line quite inspiring. “It’s not easy to be me.” It’s got a strong meaning doesn’t it? Like when you think you’ve got all the world’s burden on your shoulder, you think, it’s not easy to be me. Then you’d feel like you can accept and be ready for whatever that’s on your way. You’d think, hey, I’m a big, important person!

If you wake up and find that you have a bad hair, think, It’s not easy to be me
If you’re in the toilet having a constipating episode, think, It’s not easy to be me
If your boss gives you an impossible amount of work to do, think, It’s not easy to be me

Yea, yea, I know you got my point. I’m beginning to sound redundant aren’t I? Well, it’s not easy to be me. I have to make sure the message gets through without being twisted and manipulated into something totally different and hazardous (to me).

Sigh. I have an almost impossible list of things to get started with, in a procrastinator’s opinion. It’s not easy….to be…me.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Title: Essay (???)

I found a piece of material I wrote years ago on my old computer. I was going through its hard disk cleaning out whatever that I may not want people to see. It’s time I throw out my old computer. Read it, I retyped it out okay. There was no way I could transfer it here coz that old com cannot read my pendrive, doesn’t have a burner, and I doubt the internet would work on it without first giving me a heart attack.

************

Much of my time spent today was to concoct an essay in the hope of spinning up an amusing text. Well, I would have to say that it was a vain attempt. But at last, I am sitting down and trying to type a piece of readable matter. I have never considered myself as a person with an itch for writing. It has always been an issue for me when it comes to composing an essay. You might think, “What is it that makes it so hard about writing an essay?” Unfortunately, I myself cannot answer that. But, I do believe that many suffer from this disease of mine.

Considerations had been given to writing about issues concerning the self-absorbed, materialistic mankind or the exhausted planet earth. But in the end the mind-brawl between the two ideas are better settled with a new title. As fresh ideas flow in, the dilemma continues for the fickle-minded me. Months of not having to write a single essay have, without a doubt, taken a toll on my ability to write.

As more mental exercise took place, the buzzing insects flitting around my legs have started to annoy me. Soon enough, I found myself taking mosquito catching as a sport. Although it may sound exaggerated, I would say the air is infested with this blood-sucking creatures. I guess this is what hot and rainy season brings to life. Just then, the idea of writing about my favourite fictional character, Forrest Gump, sprang into my mind. Although just a fiction, I have always been fascinated by the way he lived his life, just by the simple words, “Life is a box of chocolates”, what his momma told him. How or why life is analogized to chocolates, I do not know. What I do know is, the world would most certainly be a better place had everyone lived the way he did, sincere and unpretentious. Some may regard him to be a bit simple, but to me, he certainly has a beautiful mind. Quoting The Dhammapada, Mind is the forerunner of all actions, All deeds are led by mind, created by mind. If one speaks or acts with serene mind, Happiness follows, as surely as one’s shadows.

That would have been what I would elaborate on if I were to write about him. However, the thought of it faded. Perhaps I prefer watching and reading it that to writing it. Brainwaves continue to propagate as I search for a different perspective to write. As physics would have hypothesized, energy would be transferred from the source of the wave, my brain. My eyelids start to droop and it is time for my spiritual sleep. I think I will stop now.

************

I absolutely do not remember when or especially why I wrote it. The English didn’t even sound like mine. I suck now. But there are parts in the piece where I sound like I’m speaking in the present and yet another in the past. I guess I can’t make up my mind whether I should be writing about what’s going on or what went on. And I think I still have that problem. Well whatever. I think some lines sound cheesy. And uh…what’s The Dhammapada?! Did I really write this?