Funny commercials

Mind a laugh?

Everybody rock your body...or rocker rock your body?

I just discovered a MV by L'Arc~en~Ciel, a Japanese rock band which has a dance at the end of their song. A rock band dancing. A really cool dance too. And it's very synchronised which makes it cooler (Who in their right minds would put an unsynchronized dance in their MV right?)



Cool, huh? Especially how their back looks like a wave when they uh...bent down, whatever. I don't know what this word may mean to you but I just feel like saying it. Kinky! (no it's not that, don't go there)

This dance sorta reminds me of Backstreet Boys' song 'Everybody' (yea...rock your body yea...) Haha. I bought that album when I was 12. So long ago. 1,2,3...10 years ago! Tsk. I'm rotting old.

Here's the vid. Incidentally the dance is around the beginning so no waiting :P And nail cutter *ahem* Nick Carter's voice is like so 'ah boy' hahahaha!


Sigh. Ii desu ne, dansu wa?

Mailbox cash

[source]

I swear I dreamt of the same thing 2 days ago. I was with my little brother (I don't have any in actuality - wonder what that means) and we were checking the mailbox. Inside there were a big pile of letters which made me really happy. And below it were notes - Rupiah notes to be exact. And they're brand new too. I have never seen the Rupiah before and Rupiah don't exactly worth much. Damn.

Sleepy cats

Considering that I'm a 'cat' - if you regard c.a.t as that animal who feels they are superior to humans, show little trust in us - and not just merely a word made up of the letters c.a.t, and if it makes you any happier, I've included here, a video on sleepy cats.

http://www.4shared.com/file/16303011/4bd6b46/sleepy_cats.html (it doesn't allow the embedding option, so copy, paste, and hit enter you lazy asshole) I'm sure if I try hard enough I can find the exact same one in YouTube but hello, I need to sleep too okay.

Sigh since my devotion to you made me visit YouTube anyway, here are more silly (but cute) cats.


More than 6 million views? What's with people and cats!? What's with me promoting it here? Weird.
This one has absense seizure. And narcolepsy.

They're kinda adorable when they fall asleep, so much so I wanna twist their heads off. I'm scary. Perhaps I need to fall asleep just like how they do it. Goddamit.

404 - You are dumb

Stole this from Chickenmafia. I even stole his title. Yay! It's funny, I thought I'd share it here. And then Paolo left this in the comments. I thought it would never end.

Little mozart?

The host of the show is boring though. Or maybe it's the language. Ooops!

I'll be missing you

Remember this one? It was a huge hit back then. Enjoy~

A tag?

This is one hell of a confusing tag. So uh...huh? Uh...copy away!

~~Begin Copy~~

This is the easy way and the fastest way to :
1. Make your Authority Technorati explode.
2. Increase your Google Page Rank.
3. Get more traffic to your blog.
4. Makes more new friends.

Rules :
1. Start copy from "Begin Copy" until "End Copy" to your blog.
2. Put your own blog name and link.
3. Tag your friends as much as you can.

1. Chickenmafia
2. Karljam
3. Ah ban
4. Arbet
5. Jeff - HainaneseChicken (I don't think you gave me a reason to your name yet)
6. Katherine with a K
7. Brown Cottage
8. TizzyB
9. Benard Cometh
10. Yakuza (ahem)
11. Geez I have no friends
12. If you happen to be not it the list, don't get angry; it's for your own good. I don't want to have sickos visit your blog.

~~End Copy~~

So now I'm supposed to tag people. Sigh. I'll tag no.2 and no. 3.

It's not easy to be me

I think the song is Kryptonite or maybe Superman; well it’s somewhere along those lines. It was on air the other day and while listening to it I found one line quite inspiring. “It’s not easy to be me.” It’s got a strong meaning doesn’t it? Like when you think you’ve got all the world’s burden on your shoulder, you think, it’s not easy to be me. Then you’d feel like you can accept and be ready for whatever that’s on your way. You’d think, hey, I’m a big, important person!

If you wake up and find that you have a bad hair, think, It’s not easy to be me
If you’re in the toilet having a constipating episode, think, It’s not easy to be me
If your boss gives you an impossible amount of work to do, think, It’s not easy to be me

Yea, yea, I know you got my point. I’m beginning to sound redundant aren’t I? Well, it’s not easy to be me. I have to make sure the message gets through without being twisted and manipulated into something totally different and hazardous (to me).

Sigh. I have an almost impossible list of things to get started with, in a procrastinator’s opinion. It’s not easy….to be…me.

Title: Essay (???)

I found a piece of material I wrote years ago on my old computer. I was going through its hard disk cleaning out whatever that I may not want people to see. It’s time I throw out my old computer. Read it, I retyped it out okay. There was no way I could transfer it here coz that old com cannot read my pendrive, doesn’t have a burner, and I doubt the internet would work on it without first giving me a heart attack.

************

Much of my time spent today was to concoct an essay in the hope of spinning up an amusing text. Well, I would have to say that it was a vain attempt. But at last, I am sitting down and trying to type a piece of readable matter. I have never considered myself as a person with an itch for writing. It has always been an issue for me when it comes to composing an essay. You might think, “What is it that makes it so hard about writing an essay?” Unfortunately, I myself cannot answer that. But, I do believe that many suffer from this disease of mine.

Considerations had been given to writing about issues concerning the self-absorbed, materialistic mankind or the exhausted planet earth. But in the end the mind-brawl between the two ideas are better settled with a new title. As fresh ideas flow in, the dilemma continues for the fickle-minded me. Months of not having to write a single essay have, without a doubt, taken a toll on my ability to write.

As more mental exercise took place, the buzzing insects flitting around my legs have started to annoy me. Soon enough, I found myself taking mosquito catching as a sport. Although it may sound exaggerated, I would say the air is infested with this blood-sucking creatures. I guess this is what hot and rainy season brings to life. Just then, the idea of writing about my favourite fictional character, Forrest Gump, sprang into my mind. Although just a fiction, I have always been fascinated by the way he lived his life, just by the simple words, “Life is a box of chocolates”, what his momma told him. How or why life is analogized to chocolates, I do not know. What I do know is, the world would most certainly be a better place had everyone lived the way he did, sincere and unpretentious. Some may regard him to be a bit simple, but to me, he certainly has a beautiful mind. Quoting The Dhammapada, Mind is the forerunner of all actions, All deeds are led by mind, created by mind. If one speaks or acts with serene mind, Happiness follows, as surely as one’s shadows.

That would have been what I would elaborate on if I were to write about him. However, the thought of it faded. Perhaps I prefer watching and reading it that to writing it. Brainwaves continue to propagate as I search for a different perspective to write. As physics would have hypothesized, energy would be transferred from the source of the wave, my brain. My eyelids start to droop and it is time for my spiritual sleep. I think I will stop now.

************

I absolutely do not remember when or especially why I wrote it. The English didn’t even sound like mine. I suck now. But there are parts in the piece where I sound like I’m speaking in the present and yet another in the past. I guess I can’t make up my mind whether I should be writing about what’s going on or what went on. And I think I still have that problem. Well whatever. I think some lines sound cheesy. And uh…what’s The Dhammapada?! Did I really write this?

Light joke in the mail

When you can't think of anything to blog about, go to your email and thank those people who endlessly forward shit to you. Sometimes the shit is not so much of a shit after all.

***************

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted, "I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas , on a fast boat and have no worries." Pfufffff. and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be In Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pfufffff. and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm."
MORAL OF THE STORY IS: "ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSS TO SPEAK FIRST"

****************

There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared. Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you A wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true."
The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted, "WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, "VODKA" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER". He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly He steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted, "SHIT!!!!!!! ......... "

LESSON: "THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN"
(I'd like to edit that to: Sometimes shit do happen)

****************

The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was In charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:
Brain....... .. I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood....... . I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs........ . I should be in charge because I take the brain where it Wants to go.
Eyes........ . I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole..... I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.
All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.

To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief

Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly

Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable

Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred

Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body

Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.


MORAL OF THE STORY: "NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE".........

*****************

It Wasn't Me

This song so reminds me of those Napster days. I think I can even smell it.



If you watched till the end, you could see that it's actually connected, the beginning and the ending, like a circle.

Oh and the bike doesn't have ABS :P

Irritable amazement

Blog…blog…that’s what I’ve been telling myself everyday. I don’t know, I’m just so lazy these days. Maybe it’s the bad digestion I’ve been having for the past 2 weeks. Sucks. You always feel full even though it’s already 4 hours after your last meal. Imagine that! Four hours after your last meal is usually the time you cry about your starvation.

Well anyway, I attended a talk unwillingly yesterday. There’s the F factor there. F for force. The talk is divided into 2 sessions with a different speaker for each talk. What’s amazing is the talk is meant to encourage patriotism (so called, huh) but the first speaker was a racist and the second a sexist. They’ve got it all covered huh? Guess who’s the victim? Imagine my pain.

On another account, my friend came to my house and changed her clothes in my room. What’s amazing (also amazing, so many amazing things, I might just die being amazed) here is that she threw her jeans over my pillow. Hmmm….hmm….who does that!? I don’t even throw my jeans on my pillow. Jesus I don’t even throw whatever dirty clothes anywhere near my pillow. Another amazing this is she asked, “Is it okay if I put my clothes here?” Sureeeeeeeeeeee…sit on my pillow if you don’t mind.

Well, I let go of that but I found out the ‘after effect’ at night. My pillow stinks of her perfume. It was just a 5 minute contact! And my pillow smells like her jeans! Did she pour her perfume on my pillow as well?? Sigh. She must have used a whole bottle of perfume on her jeans to give that kind of effect. Amazing isn’t it? Seriously, it’s so strong the smell woke me up the next morning. Shit what’s that smell!? My nose!!!

I was super irritable this morning. Perhaps I might still be. Let’s not go there. Just blame the bad digestion. Oh and, shut up, I know it’s a lame title.

Humans, the ugliest creatures in this world

I’m so sick of this. Everyone, although fully grown adults (so grown that they’re probably starting to rot already), still cannot think like one. Every division only thinks of themselves and yet they want to be one. But open your eyes, especially those who stresses on wanting to be one. You’re still referring to different divisions as separate entities. How is that one?

Everyone wants a piece of the cake. They say share. But some wants a bigger share. They say it’s only fair. Makes you wonder the definition of fair. I’m so sick of this I don’t care. If there’s a place we could all go, we should. Then they can have the cake to themselves and we’ll just see how long before the cake finishes and they start to starve. Let’s see how they bear.

Remember her?

Meredith Brooks. She sang 'I'm a Bitch'? Seems like nobody remembers her except Philos. I remember her because this is one of my favourite songs in the 90's. Let's see if you recognized the tune.


Sure reminds me of old times. Now I feel like bringing back all those 'old' songs. Lemon tree....hahaha. Maybe another time :)

The irony of life...and I say there's more to come

Lately I’ve managed to find myself something to think about. As if my mind is not fully occupied with coursework and test already, I had to add in more things for it to process. But it’s more like a uh…yin and yang thing. You know? You need something to neutralize all that poison your coursework leaves behind in your brain.

So I found myself something to work on, as I was saying, and have been surfing the net for it. And I now find myself significantly insignificant. Can’t believe I just put those two words together. They almost look like mirror images. Ok I’m rambling.

All this surfing for the thing I’m working on, which happens to really interest me, has lead me to others like myself. They’re working on the same thing, far ahead of me, likes stuff Japanese, listens to J-pop, likes to make crafts, blogs (and with proper English) and one even studies in the same course as me! I had to double check she’s not from my school. If it were just for fun, I’d be happy that I found these people. It’s like finding a ‘gang’ that you belong to. An identity has been what I’ve been searching for (though I’m not sure if finding these people gives me a shit of an identity). But now that I’ve discovered people like me, it only makes me feel less me. Oh this is confusing isn’t it? Right now, I wish they didn’t exist.

They’re talented. They have wonderful ideas in their heads. They intimidate me. Will I be able to come up with more original, imaginative, ideas? The thought that there are so many other ‘me’ out there is overwhelming. Well, to find that some of them can’t write without major grammatical mistakes kinda gladdens me but there are those who can write amazingly well. And I’ve somehow lost the gist when it comes to writing. Gone are the times when I could write stories that I myself would love to read. Something I’d read over and over and still would not get sick of. And then I’ll just bask in the egoistic thought of my amazing talent. So full of myself, aren’t I? I know you’ve had those moments. Admit it.

Now I feel so behind. As if time did not wait for me to grow up. It left me behind. And I have a lot of catching up to do. There are so many things I wanna learn it’s not possible to complete them in the time that my patience will allow. Kiasuism is starting to affect me. And finally I’ve only generated more poison for my mind. How ironic.

Utautai no Ballad - Bank Band

Sakurai said this song has a beautiful message to deliver at the end. I'm not sure about that (I'm not all that romantic you know) but just listen to his beautiful voice.



Utautai no Ballad
ah, utau koto wa
muzukashii koto janai
tada koe ni mi wo makase
atama no naka wo karappo ni suru dake

ah, me wo tojireba
mune no naka ni utsuru
natsukashii omoide ya anata to no mainichi

hontou no koto wa
uta no naka ni aru
itsumo nara terekusakute ienai koto mo

kyou datte anata wo omoinagara utautai wa utau yo
zutto ienakatta kotoba ga aru
mijikai kara kiiteokure ai shiteru
Ah…

Ah, utau koto wa
muzukashii koto janai
sono mune no mekakushi wo sotto hazuseba ii

sora ni ukanderu kotoba wo tsukande
MERODI wo noseta kumo de tabi ni dekakeru

jounentsu no kanata ni nani ga aru?
ki ni naru kara ikou yo
mado no soto ni kitakaze ga
udegumi suru BIRU no kage ni fuku keredo
bokura wo nosete melody wa tsuzuku

kyou datte anata wo omoinagara uta utai wa utau yo
dou yatte anata ni tsutaeyou
ame no yoru mo fuyu no asa mo soba ni ite

HAPPII ENDO no eiga wo ima imeeji shite utau yo
konna ni suteki na kotoba ga aru mijikai kedo kiiteokure yo,
ai shiteru...

Want to sing
Ah, singing
It’s not a difficult thing to do
Entrust your body to my voice now
Just empty your mind

Ah, if I close my eyes
I can reflect everything inside my chest
Things like the dear memories I had with you everyday

Truth
They can be found in songs
Even embarrassing words that I can’t say

However today I think back about you and
I wanna sing this song
There are always words I could not say
It’s short but please hear me, I love you
Ah…

Ah, singing
It’s not a difficult thing to do
It’s better that I slowly remove this heart’s blindfold

I catch the words that rise into the sky
Riding the melodies on a cloud
I go out traveling

What is there in this passion’s spot?
Because we can reach this mood, let’s go
With the north wind outside the window
We fold our arms as the wind blows on the building’s shadows
The never ending melody rides on us

However, today I think back about you and I wanna sing this song
Somehow I’m gonna let you know
Even on the rainy nights and in the winter mornings, I’ll be by your side
Now I’m singing with the image of a movie’s happy ending in my head
Although short, there’s such a wonderful word and I want you to hear
I love you…



I first heard this remake of Kazuyoshi Saito's song by Bank Band on Music Station. Of course watching it at 10 am in the morning is not my idea of fun. Soon after I go back to sleep the song was forgotten. Until...Arbet put it up in his blog. Now the song's burnt into my head. I tried to translate the song. What? Procrastinators translate songs??! Well, if you asked (Arbet did) and if it's my fav song I'd gladly do it. He put the translation up in his blog already but I just had to put it up in mine too. *Psst* And of course ADD the note that I do NOT guarantee the accuracy of the lyrics. It's my first time ever translating okay. He didn't make that disclaimer on my behalf. I have to make that declaration so nobody can laugh at me. Buueeekk!

If, after listening to this song, you like his voice as much as I do, let me tell you a bit about him. Sakurai is the lead singer in Mr. Children (my fav!) and also in Bank Band which he and his producer friend Takeshi Kobayashi formed to promote ap bank which they started with composer Sakamoto Ryuichi. Ap bank is a non-profit financial institution which loans money to various environmental friendly projects.

Sakurai, mijikai kedo, kiiteokure, aishiteru!

Fatso idea of a see-saw

I can never comprehend this. Look at the image below. It’s an adaptation of what academicians/books/notes/brochures used to specify which is more than the other (I'm not saying all but books/notes/brochures that I came across). Ok perhaps I shouldn’t have used human figures. Anyway just imagine they’re things labeled X and Y.

Say X is the single figure and Y is the double figure. Would you say there’s more of X or Y?

Common sense would tell you there’s more Y because it’s heavier right? Even if I only used to identical figures to represent X and Y, you would still say there's more Y right? But no, according to the sources I chanced upon, it’s actually the other way round. Which smartass came up with this!? I mean, don’t use a freaking see-saw if you wanna use height as a measure of quantity. Thanks for confusing all the kids about simple, basic physics.

It's random, no title! Ok, fine, it's about me, myself and I

Why do I have to crack my head for a title everytime? And I have to choose a freaking label for it at the end too.

I quit my job. Been wanting to quit and I finally did. Now I can have Wednesday and Thursday nights free. Oh dear what should I do with them? I’m starting to miss my colleagues too. And most importantly I’ll have to visit my ATM friend more often. My account is gonna burn. But I hope this is encouraging enough for me to start sourcing for money elsewhere. In fact there is another desperate reason for me to do that but let’s just let it be first.

On the last day of my job which was what, 3 days ago, I almost got into a road accident. I was on my way to class, going up the sloping road towards a corner when another car coming down the slope skidded. I don’t know how to describe it but imagine a car coming from the opposite side suddenly making a U-turn into your lane.

I didn’t see how it happened because I was looking at the lorry parked at the road side with long metal ‘sticks’ sticking out of it. They look like they’re gonna slip off anytime and who knows, pierce into my car when I pass next to it. Well anyway they didn’t but a car almost rammed into me alright. Thank god I turned back soon enough to see it and hit the brakes. But even if I didn’t it wouldn’t be much of a damage. I might lose a headlight or two, break the water tank, etc. It would be a pain in the ass though. But if I had left the house 2 seconds earlier (yea, melodramatic), I would be in the right position where he would have rammed right into me. And I mean, right into me, on the driver’s side. Or if he started his journey 2 seconds later he would still crash into me. Endless possibilities.

So what happened after that? He drove to the side to check his tyre and I drove off like nothing happened. Well nothing did happen. When I told people about it they showed horrifying expressions but I told them I felt nothing. I don’t know. I’ll probably be punished by God one day, if there’s one, for not appreciating life.

P.S. To you Americanized people, tyre is British okay. And sorry for causing you a headache. I know I can’t even connect sentences or ideas together. Forgive me for I have not written anything in a while. Oh shoosh! I should just stop making a fool of myself now.